I so hate consequences, running from you is what my best defense is.

I'm realizing just how much my secrets are beginning to hurt me.
Isn't it hilarious that I used to feel alone when I had everyone I cared about, and now that I've lost them, I've become too numb to truly miss them? *laughs a little*
So far, I have two teachers seriously worried about me... Apparently I "haven't been myself" the past few days. I've become a lot quieter. A lot more studious, I think. I haven't had the "distractions" I usually have, so its been good, I guess, for my grades.
It seems as though I've just given up the things I believe in. Its great. :) All I need now to give up on grades... then I can focus on... nothing? Idk. *shrugs*
I had a serious thought today. I think I'd like to be a librarian. Like... Not a librarian as a side job, a library sciences specialist. I'd be a good librarian. I wouldn't bitch out the kids. I like systems- especially alphabetizing. :) And I'd get to be around BOOKS. Plus, I have the glasses. I also like the idea of getting to read for a living... I know "Media Specialists" get paid for that. And why are the librarians so bitchy anyway? Its not like they actually get in trouble for the kids looking up email on the internet. *sighs* I'd hate being a teacher, cuz I care too much about other's opinions, but a librarian... *sighs happily*
Just a stupid fantasy though. My mom would hate the idea.