Dearest Darlingest Readers...

Greetings from Windows 98 from the Stone Age!

Today's Opening: International Kissing Day.(Today!)

I'm not sure whether to be:

a. Excited, because I have someone.

b. Offended, because THERE IS A KISSING DAY!

c. Disappointed, because... Well, my someone is far too far away to kiss.

d. Curious... How did such a holiday come about? Is this just part of the Lolita Effect?

Speaking of Lolita, Gothic Lolita has been playing through my iPod speakers all day. I realised today how COMPLETELY SCARED I am. I've always thought I was pretty brave... Obviously not!

Things I Am Afraid Of:

1. Driving. Oh. My. Goodness. Me, the absolute hugest klutz in the English-speaking WORLD, with a large piece of metal at my fingertips?? Someone is going to die. Probably me.
2. Sex. Aside from the fact that according to pretty much everyone I know, it means I'll go to hell, I'm worried about being bad at it. Also, isn't it supposed to hurt? Yeah... I'm worried that I'll screw it up. No pun intended.
3. Being a Mom. Aww, man, me with kids? That's like... Putting the kids on death row. I couldn't take care of freaking GOLDFISH... How could I do children????
4. Losing People. Quite honestly, I have a few people I am dependent on. Usually, five. Those five people have my heart, and I will go to great lengths to defend them.

Am I strange for being so fearful? I'd never even considered myself a scared person before... Now I recognise that fear shouldn't stop me from doing what I need to do. After all, some famous person once said something close to Bravery is not the absence of fear, but the knowledge that other things are more important. I'm not saying that I'm going to go out and have sex right this minute, because that'll get rid of my fear. Not at all. But I can kiss someone and not be afraid, right?
This leads me to another realisation. I do not need to change who I am for other people.
I am my own person, not an extension of others, and I am allowed, if not encouraged to be different.
Watch out world... You have a major wave of change coming.
Hugs and Kisses!
~disasters.bitch~
P.S.- Do something today that scares you. I wanna hear about it. ;)

Dear Lovely Readers,

Firstly, I'd like to apologize for my username.
The profanity is not meant offensively, simply as a statement to who I am.
Now that I've cleared that up, today's ranting shall ensue.
Masks.
I absolutely adore masks. Why, you ask, are masks a good enough topic to write an entire entry about?
Lets start with the three types of mask-wearers:

1. People who want to attract attention to who they are, by pretending to be what they are obviously not. These include, but are not limited to:

• Children on Halloween.
• Bank Robbers
• Girls at Costume Parties

2. People who actually want to remain a secret:

• People at Masquerade Balls
• Bank Robbers

3. People whose masks aren't literal, but simply faces that they show the world:

• E-v-e-r-y-o-n-e

Shakespeare once said that the whole world is a stage, and all the people are players.

I say- All the world is a masquerade, and you never know who the hell you're talking to.

I am all three types of mask wearers- I am an actress, I am invisible, and wish to stay anonymous, and I am definately not open with the world at large. But I am willing to change.

So today, with my Brand New Blog, hereby refered to as DBB- Disaster's Bitch's Bitchings (Nice, right?) I AM DITCHING MY MASK. I am throwing myself a coming out party. I've finally taken the plunge(black fingernails), held my breath(ohmygod, people are never gonna read this...) and come out of my little dark closet. Byyy the way- Disaster is a girl. A really beautiful girl who constantly breaks my heart and almost never says she's sorry.

;) Goodnight Darlings.

Lots of Love,

~disasters.bitch~